Blackberriphernalia

Origin:
Blackberry + paraphernalia = Blackberriphernalia

Definition:
n. accessories or other accoutrements for a Blackberry phone

Exemplum:
A new wireless headset was the latest addition to Claire's collection of Blackberriphernalia. However it did little to improve her caustic personality and frightfully awkward conversational skills.

Commentary:
Today's term satisfies one's craving for a portmanteau that's septisyllabic while remaining easily enunciated, inspiringly intuitive and adhesively memorable. And it addresses the cultural phenomenon of mobile technology accessorization in a way that's direct yet still upbeat. Bravo. (Clap.......clap.......clap.) Bra.......(clap......clap).....vo.

And please note how it relieves our desire for a clever term while taking the high road of refinement and aural aesthetics, beyond the ubiquitously abrasive "crackberry." The house in which I was raised didn't make light of its pesky addiction problems with half-heartedly sarcastic, low-brow neologisms. We addressed our addictions head-on with day-long drinking and smoking binges and snippy passive aggressive commentary on the veranda. And we turned out fine. Except for Claire, of course.

And if smartphone overuse is truly your vice, I'm sure there's an app for that (on the iPhone, anyway).

Credit:
Will Seibold