frenemy

Origin:
friend + enemy = frenemy

Definition:
n. a person who acts outwardly friendly to someone he or she truly despises

Exemplum:
Despite their seemingly cordial rapport, Justin and Richard were life-long frenemies, a status that made everyone on the polo field uneasy.

Commentary:
Again, the origin of today's term is sincerely horrid. I'm told it hails from MTV's The Hills and was coined to describe the relationship between characters Heidi Montag Pratt and Lauren Conrad. Language lacks the depth and nuance to express the annoyance, ennui and white collar rage I feel based on the fact that these two are associated with the coinage of such a formidable portmanteau.

I'd much prefer a connotation with characters Lucille Bluth and Lucille Ostero from Fox's golden-headed step-child Arrested Development. Their frenemyship ebbed and flowed so delectably across three ill-fated seasons. Alas, I digress.

While frenemy's pedigree use is eternally regrettable, it is indeed a fascinatingly apt term. It also illustrates another nascent trend in today's portmanteaux-- the oxymoron.

By nature, the oxymoron is quizzical. Why would two opposites ever be used together to even necessitate the word oxymoron? And yet the oxymoronism of the friend/enemy dichotomy is alive and well.

But then to take these unlikely bedfellows and force them to share a single word is a stroke of tender, supple genius. Doesn't it just make you want to lay back against your burled walnut headboard a smoke a cigarette? Simply amazing.

Kindly expect a few more neologisms from the oxymoron category in the coming days.

Credit:
Idiots from Cali (term), Nate Winter (the rest)